Jesse Pinkman (Aaron Paul) - Breaking Bad -Problem Dog

I honestly don’t know where to begin with this first post. I wish I can sit here and type out on tis laptop that I have this grand plan for not only this post but  for this entire Blog in general and yet, I simply don’t. I have no schemes, strategy, blueprint, or even a end game to all of this. I am in  honestly going into this filed with a sleepwalking motive. I have tried and still do consider other options about different things  I wish to take my life path towards but, in the big picture element of thinking in terms of loneliness when I can reflect on the future, I ask myself these abstract, deep, and taboo questions that everyday thoughts, illusions, and distractions quickly block out to shift focus to something more easier and digestible. The main and basic question of course I want to focus on is I’m sure the same one that every person has heard, asked, or thought about in life. To quote one of my favorite TV characters of all time, but use it in a slightly different context to add more food for thought to my own criticism:  

If you just do stuff and nothing happens, what does it all mean? What’s the point

I am not trying to come off as depressing or try to gain a “Woe is me” response from anybody that takes the time to read this blog but I am asking this question in the sense that, what I chose to do and add attention to in my limited time on this planet going to mean in the long run? Does anybody remember the people standing next to Martian Luther King in the black & white photos from the past? Does anybody watch the end credits of a movie or TV show and want to learn more about those people that are shown on the screen for a couple of seconds? Can you tell me who was number 10 on the billboard charts this week without using the internet or a magazine article? If all these answers do is trigger a response of “I don’t know” or “Who cares” then my point, unfortunately, is being made. Yet, even with this most basic knowledge and response why do I still continue to type? Why do I still wake up everyday knowing that in the back of my mind there is not only a chance but, a very good chance that I will end up just being in the background and forgotten. Everybody can’t be the Star. Somebody has to buy the product and play the customer role.   



free choice (1)Neo says in the above video “Because I chose to” and for some reason as I reflect and watch this video again now from a more mature and adult perspective I get a funny feeling inside of me. From my POV, its as if he is saying he is “Comfortable in the dark” in the very concrete knowledge and damn near fact of what was told to him by Agent Smith. There was no doubt that what was said to Neo was as clear and as obvious to anyone else who hears it once you grow up and understand life better. Yet, Neo can not be blamed alone on this because,= honestly we all do this and react this way. In the back of our minds we know that more than likely all of our struggles, disappointments, mid-level success, temporary happiness, etc are all one in the same in the long run. As I stated above, everybody is not going to be a star. We were all told we will become great and wonderful people when we are children and become anything we want while achieving as much as we desire as long as we set our minds right and focus on the goal. While I agree to some extent with that as long as you work your ass off and stay the path, some of us simply due to circumstances and bad positioning are NOT going to be able to be anything we want. “Because I chose to” even sounds like a “Yeah, I know all that but, I will still fight”. Its bad faith in a nutshell. Neo on some level agrees to what Agent Smith has said by even replying back with that answer.  Its insane, doltish, semblance, and just downright a waste of time to think like this yet….. In order for this world to succeed, this type of  feelings over logic introspective must be in order for this “system” to function.



sacrificeBecause, somebody has to take the position as a garbage man or janitor at a local high school sometime in they’re life. Yet, I am sure dreams and aspirations of more financial gain were always ahead of thoughts about what type of cleaner would best fit to help reduce the smell of the trash can from becoming worse. Somebody will need they’re change brought back to them properly when they buy fast food so, a person will have to be there and collect the money at the register. Others will need to be there to serve and wait on others in a restaurant with the high chance of not being tipped properly an most likely have to deal with a onslaught of constant complaints, rude behavior, and being treated as lower than human due to the perception of the waiter and waitress from smug people who “think” they are better because they are being served for that limited amount of time. 

dv1693021The jobs I mentioned above along with others I failed to mention play a specific role in the function of success. Its the balance of service and sacrifice. Sacrifice for others chaos is all we will be. Blind vision is mandatory forced for others Power to remain above ant hills. Product does not sell on its own nor does it promote itself with the intention behind it reflecting the customer. Fans buy music that either makes them feel good or is relate-able in they’re life. Not all product has to be but, a good portion of product has a relate-able factor to it. Organically some stars in music have people drawn to them due to who they are in life with they’re personality and overall presentation of character. While others are created due to having a hit record that connects to a wider audience beyond they’re location of birth. All of these things carry a connection of relating to the people that purchase or support the project. In all forms of media from books, movies, clothes, etc. Its all about being able to relate. With that said, the undertone of that being people are happy to see others succeed…. for awhile.

Because once you are build up the only thing left for you is to be broken down. Some starts due to they’re own vices and demons but, some also due to not being able to deliver product the same as the past. In which that causes a rift in public perception so the breakdown must begin. But the main reason I think this is, is because of the very known knowledge that the fan wants to be the star as well to some extent. If you let a balloon go the obvious result is its going to fly away and become out of reach until it comes crashing down from losing air. That’s the metaphor that I believe fits perfect for this. If we the people that purchase and bring the product to new heights becomes too out of reach, it leaves us out of a chance to reach the same heights. Its why we become somewhat hostile when a product becomes inferior yet still remains on top. We begin to route for other people that are more deserving (Aka closer to our financial means) to live vicariously through them and succeed. We still want to achieve the same means but we need inspiration to continue to pursue them. Yes, this is from a Entertainment POV but, I feel it still connects on a universal whole. A artist like Jay Z is inspirational indeed but we can’t relate to his life as much as we would be able to relate to a upcoming artist that is trying to make it and survive out here. We build them up for our own ego, then tear them down for our own ego so we feel like there is still a chance. 

mazeThis is where it gets interesting. In order for others to succeed in this day and age they’re has to be some return on they’re investment. Back then, people were just enslaved and had no choice nor prize at the end of they’re hard work. But now, people want something in return. When someone purchases a album, book, or movie they expect to get something of value in return for they’re hard earned money that was spent on the product. When they don’t receive that, they become disinterested and move on to something that will please them. While, on a surface level thought I understand that but, on a much deeper level I feel this relates to a much more universal question like the one I stated above, and with the video I used. Yes, I know that in the long run I am just fighting to to fight “Because I chose to” but, also deep in my soul I “feel” I am entitled to something. I feel as if I should be rewarded for my hard work.

In order to do that, it has to be something to strive for. Some prize in the bottom of the cereal box. That’s what the balance of sacrifice and service comes into play. These people (Us) were placed in positions due to they’re hard work of course but, also to display the the other 99% that there was A CHANCE to be rich. They are the poster children of dreams. It keeps people working hard FOR A REASON. Yes, I know in order to achieve that YOU must work hard in life but, lets be honest as I have said before constantly, not everyone is going to be a star.

Not everyone can become rich. If so, there would be no rich. No teachers, cops, doctors, etc. Everybody would be too busy making money. Objectively speaking, Certain people in Power must remain while the other stay in they’re place. You must stand out and think as a individual in order to gain what you want but, the overall fact is that the 1% controls the 99% and as crazy as it sounds I believe it has to be this way or else it would be chaos. Followers make the world while the leaders create the path. The mouse does not move in the maze without the cheese atfrabz-heaven-is-a-broken-promise-so-that-poor-people-never-escape-the--6fe93d the end of it. Question is for us tho, what is the cheese? Is there even a cheese to begin with. On a higher level some think its heaven. While I hope it is too, even you have to admit that heaven relates to something more grounded in earth. Which can not work if heaven is above human thought. Or is it? Heaven to me relates to the “cheese” we have been conditioned to fight for in life that we are promised in death if we act “right”. How can we celebrate in death? Well its Simple. And that is there is no heaven. Just the illusion of success.



polyp_cartoon_Rat_Race_BWSome people in life have a  different idea of what “success” means or is to them in the grand scheme of  it all. Some people believe success is having a couple kids, some animals, house, cars, and some money saved up for a rainy day. Others think success is being healthy and simply having a roof and clothes on your back despite in not being in style. And others believe success is just having some privacy with they’re drug of choice and a nice female friend to hang with on a constant basis until the mood sets itself in the right direction (Sex). Some even could care less about money, latest gadgets, fashion, shoes, cars, etc. Its meaningless to them. But most, if not damn near almost everyone has a locked in concept and idea of what success is to them. And that’s the success, status, and end result of Celebrity culture. 

lights-flashing-actionNot everybody wants to be a actor, actress, rapper, singer, dancer, model, etc. No question about that. Most if not a lot of people when you look at the sales of a project just want to watch things and be entertained after a hard day of dealing with mindless repetition in a constrained amount of time. But you as well as I can’t deny the fact that the end result of celebrity culture is something we all strive to achieve. No? Then why does the general public continue to spend a fortune on lottery tickets? Why does the population continue to take long drives down to the Casino every other weekend? Why are we spending millions and maybe even billions on scratch tickets that sometimes only offer 3-5 dollars?  And Why do we as a people bust are ass at work to achieve a 15 cent or sometimes if  you are lucky enough a Dollar raise? The end result of celebrity is a dream we all wish to have or at least work towards. Travel, status, security, less stress, power, etc. All of these things are basically universal in our wants. Its just that with Celebrity culture it is raised to a much broader and wider level. We are all looking for better opportunities so we may accomplish more in life. The end result of celebrity culture is the standard whether we admit it or not for the general public. If this wasn’t the end game there would be a line of people signing up to be garbage men or sign flippers for a insurance company. 

MTV Unplugged: NirvanaBut with all that said I allude your attention to the above video. This rush towards being rich and wealthy in our life seems to be the only thing we honestly care about. Its as if “this is it”. This, is what happiness is defined as for the world. Consumerism is not just a cult but a way of life. The video above has a different context than I am discussing but, the message to me still rings very loud and true. o-WHITNEY-HOUSTON-STYLE-facebookFrom a logical look, its two actors displaying to the world on the big screen they’re acting chops. Yet, mix that in with the message I’m trying to display and its quite a treat. Jeremy Piven’s character in red in my view is explaining to the rapper Common’s character that this life isn’t all its cracked up to be. This life has offered him a chance to live it on the greener side but, the results still remain from the not so green side. I also find it intriguing that he said “That’s why I am valuable here ivy, and that is why you are not.” Almost as if to say that THIS, this right here is where it counts. Yet before he says “That is the lie I tell your eyes. Making the magic happen in the moment in the split second. But seeing behind this motherfucker and knowing… that its all bullshit”. He knows that there really is no way out of this. Sure, he knows its all a game and most likely true happiness (Subjective wise) may never be reached through materialistic means but, the other side of the coin is, what? What then? Better to be rich than struggling. Valuable in this modern day is to be wealthy. Its what we all strive for if we have no other outlets of expression. By him saying “You are not valuable” is to say you don’t matter if you have no money with you. Don’t think so? When was the last time you had a conversation with a homeless man for man than 2 minutes tops? As much as I enjoy writing this post and exploring the language of celebrity-worshipfreedom, I know how the constructed game is played. Its more of now having objective eyes instead of deep emotionally invested eyes. In relation to that, Common’s character goes on to say “It doesn’t matter what you want. Its what you did” after he was told by Jeremy Piven’s character he never wanted it to be like this. I place myself in Common’s shoes here. I feel as if  these stars should do better to teach the blind that this is not the thing to strive for. To just be rich and chase fame. Ignorant of course but honest. What else should they teach them? What? Find a spiritual path to go on? Okay cool but, how will you eat? Survive with no shelter? Find a mate? etc. The path towards money is what keeps this society in substance at the expensive of our empty stomachs. Dammed if you do, dammed if you don’t. We are nature but can’t make it in nature alone.

 Depression, chaos, anxiety, sadness,regret, resent, pain, etc.  Kurt Cobain, Eminem, Whitney Houston, Britney1251924263_eminem_lg Spears, etc. All of these people have or, had tasted success but, it didn’t change life. It merely just placed a time checkpoint on it. Death, drugs, loneliness, depression, pain, etc. These things don’t become obsolete on this limited journey. If anything with gain success they just become much bigger and worse than when money and status was limited . Sure, this may come off as it I am hating or just upset that they are rich and I am not. I would understand why you feel that way. Yet, I’m honestly just trying to understand my unconscious need to chase. Sure, its in a man’s nature to hunt and gather. But that was due to living and striving from the animals and crazy mood swinging nature back to the caveman days. But is that all I am doing? Just surviving to later on just die? All my hard work is not even for me. If I have children that would be the only reason to keep pushing. If not, why keep trying. And that’s why I feel like the purpose of materialism and fame is skyrocketed pass sky limits. Its to keep us going for a bigger system to function. Pawns   


                                                                    “THE ASSOCIATION” 

To quote from the website Gods and 

The story behind the Capricorn zodiac sign begins with the sea-goat Pricus. Pricus is the father of the race of sea-goats, who are known to be intelligent and honorable creatures who live in the sea near the shore. They can speak and think and are favored by the gods.

Pricus is tied to Chronos (Greek mythology), the god of time. Chronos is the creator of the immortal Pricus, who shares Chronos’s ability to manipulate time.

The legend that ties Pricus to Capricorn mythology begins when the younger sea-goats, Pricus’s children, find their way onto the shore. The sea-goats seem to be naturally drawn to the shore. They can use their front goat legs to pull themselves onto the beach and lay in the sun. The longer they stay on shore, though, the more they “evolve” from sea-goats into regular goats. Their fish tails become hind legs and they lose their ability to think and speak, essentially becoming the goats that we know today.

This upsets Pricus a great deal. As the father of the sea-goat race, he is determined to make sure that his children never get to the shore. If they do, he fears they will become mindless animals who can never return to sea.

After losing several of his children to the land, Pricus decides to use his ability to reverse time to force his children to return to the sea. During this time reversal, everything on earth, except Pricus, reverses itself to where it was previously, thus the goats revert back to the time to before they returned to land.

Pricus, being unaffected by the time shift, is the only one who knows what is to become of the sea-goats. He tries to warn them, even forbid them from setting foot onto the shore, but no matter what he does, or how many times he reverses time, the sea-goats eventually still find their way onto land and become regular goats.

The pivotal moment in Capricorn mythology occurs when Pricus finally realizes that he cannot control the destiny of his children, and that trying to keep them in the sea will never work, no matter how many times to tries to “start over”. He resigns himself to his loneliness, and chooses to no longer reverse time, instead letting his children live their lives out to their own destiny

Now, I know this is related to the science / religion of the Zodiac which has be debunked by several people but, in my opinion this holds weight to me at least. But, that is for another time. I say this because the point of this blog is more so enriched in realism so, seeing something related to horoscopes may bring some discredit to this blog and my goal of helping others. Also, because this story relates to the main point of what I am trying to say everybody with this first (And very long) post. I chose this because I wanted to to be my main objective going forward and use this as a starting point. The story here is the message. Whether real or not it holds true now and later once I am long gone. 

No matter how many times Pricus tried to change and reverse time to save his children from going in the sea, the outcome was still the same. That’s how I feel when I look back on this post and just life in general. No matter what I do to try and change things the outcome will remain the same in the end. That is how I feel when it comes to this content that reflects the context of my life. Success, fame, gadgets, women, money, etc. All of these things are given meaning by us and those above us. It keeps up chasing air and trying to box it it but, nothing is there. Take all of this items and yourself and go on a deserted island by yourself and see just how much this stuff will help you. 

Death waits for no man. Yet, it is also blinded for every man by a blindfold which, can easily be removed. Tho, we simply chose not to. Being in the dark with everybody else brings some light that will Ironically still guides us….



Categories: Philosophical

Tagged as:

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s